I knew that now. Asking her about Phyllis was my way of breaking the news to her that I had read the first part of her journal. It was not meant to be malicious. How did I know she would react the way she did? I had thought, incorrectly, that we had no secrets from each other. Boy! Was I ever wrong!Effectively, Kelley's journal entry had admitted that she had been less than honest when she told me Danny was her first and only lover before college.Now I couldn't wait to read the second part of her journal. What else did she have to hide?Kelley's Journal - Part Two.That November 1985 night with Danny Starling altered my outlook more than my parents' death or my adoption had. Suddenly, I wanted to announce to the world that I'd become a woman.My Mom knew what had happened as soon as she saw me the next morning and Julia said that she would have known, even if word hadn't reached her by way of Phillip, who had heard it from Danny. I called Phyllis and she rushed over to talk."Did you. .. I'm sorry."She asked, "What do you have to be sorry for?"I told her, "Because I know that's not what you want... That's whyyou're taking the blockers right? That and many other things..."She shrugged her shoulders. "I'd never really had those reactionsJordan... Ever... I thought it would be horrible to have one... Ithought it would scream look I'm not really a girl... At least that'swhat I always thought it would..."I told her, "See, that's why I'm sorry..."She placed her fingers back on my lips to shush me and told me, "But itdoesn't bother me like that... At least with you... The worst thingabout it right now is the gaff being uncomfortable... It doesn't make mefeel any less me, ya know? I just didn't want you to be creeped out... Iwanted you know what it meant considering it shouldn't be doing that...What you do to me Jordie..."I blushed. "It doesn't weird me out Sam... You're still you, the super-hot softball goddess."She asked, "Really?" When I nodded while smiling, she.
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